Blog # 5 "Orientation"-A Guide to the Office

 "A Guide to the Office"

This is the front desk. This is the back office. Doctor’s office is here. Kelly’s office is right across from Doctor’s, she is his wife, and she is responsible for the medical and patient billing. This is a room used for storing medical files. This room is for doctor’s children.

This room is the break room; it’s mainly used for storing food in the refrigerator or heating food in the microwave. Check expiration dates, I found mayonnaise in here that expired back 2005. All the Nutrisystem items are doctors don’t eat them, he doesn’t eat them either, but he’ll know. Don’t heat your breakfast here Kelly will have a fit and complain that it nauseates her. You can heat your food up at lunch, but not before you will get in trouble for sitting on your bottom. Lunches are an hour unless it’s your week to answer the phones. During those weeks you can’t leave the office, but you can eat your lunch. Be mindful that you are still working and Kelly will give you lots of things to do, even if you are eating. Doctor comes back from his lunch early sometimes to take a nap, Never ask him anything when he is taking a nap, don’t knock on the door, be really quiet; if you don’t he will be really mean for the rest of the day.

These are the patient rooms. Keep them cleaned and picked up. Patients don’t need to see a dirty room and the wife will find out and make you feel like crap. Always wipe down the tables after each patient, and make sure the lotions are put away nice and neat. If you drop lotion on the floor just rub it in the carpet with a towel or your foot, doctor or the patient won’t notice anyway, because the floors look awful and they were cleaned a week ago. Green gowns are the biggest gowns save those for large people. Red gowns are for medium sized they can go on average people. Blue gowns go on small people, there aren’t very many so use them on small people.

Do not put large people in this room, they will break the table. Put people with big bellies in these rooms the tables drop down for their bellies. Use lots of lotion on hairy backs, it is gross, but refrain from making comments you will be fired. Use lots of pressure on bigger men when giving a massage, they will complain if you don’t. If your hands are not hurting by the end of the day you didn’t use enough pressure. These tables will rise up to be level with your hip, do not touch the tables to do this, you will be yelled at by doctor and so will the rest of us. Don’t ask common sense questions to Doctor he will think you are stupid just ask the staff.

If Doctor comes in cranky and rude, his wife will be really nice. If the doctor compliments you on your hair or your outfit Kelly will copy you the next day to see if he will give her the same reaction, he won’t so be sure to compliment her. When doctor and Kelly argue from their offices there will always be a patient in the lobby, be sure to speak to them so they don’t over hear. If you have any questions ask me or another co-worker, don’t ask doctor or Kelly they don’t run the office they just think they do and the answer is always wrong.